Everyone is equal. No one is published - yet. You like and trust each other. Everyone works diligently and one day, you write The End to your first story. You are the one to write the first query and come to meetings with rejections in hand, but it’s your nature to survive and thrive. So you begin another story.
The friends seem more interested in what you’re doing than in their writing and they become more critical. “Add more to this... The reader wants to know... I'd write it this way instead... You should ...” You keep writing and incorporate their ideas because you trust them.
Your first book is PUBLISHED! The women want to expand the group-a good idea-new blood-fresh input and you’re the first one with a real live book and now you’re not just a person who writes. You are an author. They purchase your book, you sign, so excited to be doing this, and continue writing the second story.
The expanded group has grown to ten. Not everyone brings pages to read to meeting. They eat lunch, talk about health and grandchildren, and finally get down to reading pages because it’s getting late. Lots of attention is paid to every comma you do or don’t use, and many questions about who, what, why have you written this and that. You drive home shaking your head. It’s getting to be a struggle. When book two is published, the congratulations slows to minimal and some of the women don’t purchase the book. Hmm. No biggie but hmm. You’re not looking for a standing ovation but it’s a huge accomplishment to be published. Ah well.
It’s unpleasant to discover friends can change and no longer be true friends. The sky is filled with stars; there’s room for all if us. If they feel my star has outshone theirs, perhaps it’s because I work and focus. I have the fever to express, to tell a story. And I’m not afraid to cry and laugh as I write. I’m not in competition with anyone. I write for the passion of writing.
I thought all this behavior was left behind when you grew up. I guess not.
If you’ve had similar experiences with critique groups, I’d sure like to hear about them. Just a snippet to let me know I’m not alone.
P.S. The VHP family welcomed me with open arms a few months ago. I thank all of you for making me feel at home.
Note from Kimberlee: Charmaine's post brings up some thoughts about what critiqueing is and what it is not, and Smoky Trudeau gave me permission to include her Critique Group Guidelines for your use:
GROUP CRITIQUE GUIDELINES
When You are Reviewing Another Student’s Work:
• Try to always begin with a positive comment. It is as important for writers to know what works with their writing in addition to what doesn’t.
• Be specific and objective. Offer suggestions, not just criticism. “I don’t know, I just don’t like it,” or “It was good, I liked it” are not specific, objective, or helpful.
• Direct your comments to the writing, not the writer.
• Don’t focus on grammar or punctuation—that’s my job (the editor), not yours.
• Don’t repeat what others have already said.
When Your Work is Being Reviewed:
• Stay out of the discussion unless you are asked a specific question. This is hard, because you will want to defend your work. But you need to let the work speak for itself. If asked to clarify something, limit your response only to what is asked.
• Don’t take negative comments personally. No one is judging you—they are critiquing your work. Critique is NOT the same as criticism. Writers who don’t learn to distinguish between the two can rest assured they never will be published.
• Remember, ultimately you are the only one who can judge whether or not you take the advice offered by your peers. If you have doubts about their input, or need further clarification of comments, ask your editor or publisher for input.
The dance of life continues with all steps forward-no slip sliding as in the past. I am excited,over-joyed,ecstatic. Get the picture? This author is one happy woman. To Be Continued, my first book with Vanilla Heart Publishing, has gotten good reviews. Women write that they cheer when the straying husband gets what's coming to him. My latest novel, Starting Over, romance/suspense was just released, and my third novel, What Now?, a paranormal (ghostly presence and psychic abilities) romantic suspense. Books are available in print, ebook format, Kindle, and Nook.
http://AuthorCharmaineGordon.xanga.com
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